In some respects fear is a positive thing. It is part of our evolutionary process as it helps to warn us of danger, in much the same way as the pain from putting our hand in a hot fire prevents us from getting burnt. In some respects it is not always positive and a good example of this is a phobia of commitment.
Fear has long been a key part of the human psyche. Like pain it is designed to warn the body and mind of danger and keep it alert. This has often been documented as fight or flight as the body reacts to the fear either by defending itself from a perceived threat or running away from it.
However some fears are not necessarily rational. While it is understandable to be afraid of fire or scary looking animals, there is no rational reason to be afraid of clowns, beards, the number 13 or any other number of things that do not offer any real threat to us. For someone who fears commitment they react in much the same way as other people do toward their irrational fears.
One thing people often admit is that they fear losing the independence that they enjoy as a single person. This can often mean being able to stay out for as late as you want or being able to wash up later on if you want to. However these are often superficial reasons for not making a commitment.
It is vital to be honest and try to be as subjective as possible. You need to consider the reasons why you do not want to settle with someone. Equally you want to consider the goals that you have in life and how you want to achieve them. Ideally you want to find a partner who shares these goals.
Acknowledging that you have this fear is the first step to overcoming it. Most mentors or life coaches will then advise you to discuss your life goals with your partner. This then gives you the idea of whether you want to commit to making a commitment with them. This process should then help you look past your initial fear to help you rationally look at your relationship and whether it is developing into something you want.
It is also important to acknowledge that the occasional argument is healthy and not something to worry about. Compromise is a part of relationships. Equally it is important to remember that you are sharing a relationship and the other person will often have to make sacrifices as well. This is often all part of the discussion to help you learn more about making that initial step towards sharing your life with a partner.
In simple terms phobia of commitment is mainly a mental problem. It is often a fear of the unknown. Therefore it is worth seeking the right advice to help you communicate those fears, find out the goal you have in life and to help you learn more about what you can offer a partner. If you are prepared to work at it you can overcome this and gain the reward of a beneficial long term relationship.
Phobia of commitment can be the result of numerous different emotions and environmental issues. When you have a commitment fear, you will find help online.
