Dating Men – Why Do Some Women Date Losers?
By Jo Baker
We all know them. Women who have a pattern of going out with guys who treat them badly and leave them crying. Do you know someone who is in the habit of dating men who do this? Maybe you can identify with this, and you want to know why some women date losers.
For women in those situations it is not their fault. No one has taught them how to identify the signs of men who would treat them in such a way. So how do you go about identifying these men?
Let us begin by defining what a man is like when he behaves like this.
He is a man who is focused more on himself than anyone else. He does not care too much about a woman’s needs. He is practiced in sweet-talking a woman into falling in love with him and getting them into bed. He will seem like the perfect gentleman, and wine you, and dine you. He will tell you how beautiful you are and how lucky he is that you are going out with him. But, does he tell you that he loves you? Does he change the subject if you hint at commitment? Does he avoid meeting your family and your friends?
Your relationship is amazing in the beginning, but gradually he becomes less excited to be with you and more distant. He forgets your dates, or forgets his wallet when you are on a date so that you have to pay. Of course, he will apologize most sincerely. Eventually, he will stop calling after going cold on you and you are left wondering, what did you do, how can you find out what do men want…
No woman wakes up in the morning and thinks to herself, “Today, I want to find a man who will hurt me, then leave me…”
In the first stages of a relationship, emotions are usually so intense that it is easy to confuse them with love and dependability. They feel good with this new man and are excited to see him. They think this means that he is a good man and the one for them. Feelings themselves are not wrong but the intensity blind-sides them to the behaviors that would reveal their man’s true intent.
How do you find out how to identify men like this? Begin by taking things slowly, and allow him to show himself to be loving and trustworthy. You can still enjoy being with him, but allow your family and friends to alert you to anything that they can see or sense, to decide if he is the one for you.
Find out what men really want in a woman by asking other men in your life, like brothers or good friends. Women friends who have loving successful relationships can certainly share with you what works for them. It is not wise to listen to friends who struggle to find a nice guy, as they haven’t been able to, either.
So, what do men want in a woman?
One of the things that a man looks for in a woman is that she is someone who is confident within herself. She has sorted out what she wants in life and likes who she is. Confidence in a woman is like a magnet to men. On the contrary, women who are unsure of themselves or project as being needy scare men away. While they may wish to help them and protect them initially, men soon get to the point where they do not know how to fix it or even if they can fix it, and are quickly out of their depth, cannot cope and so leave.
So, when dating men, do not throw yourself in too soon, be alert to his better qualities and his questionable behaviors. Find out what men want in relationships.
If he appears to be too good to be true, then perhaps he is.
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